An Ode to the Neighbor

Upon my parents' relocation to their current residence two decades ago, they were warmly greeted by the neighbor. Tragically, his wife fell ill within a few months and eventually passed away. Following his wife's demise, he, a widower, distanced himself from our entire community. For the past 21 years, he lived alone, typically maintaining solitude. His interactions were primarily limited to the essential vendors—those providing milk, newspapers, and food supplies.

He had a routine of rising at 4 am, taking a morning stroll, consciously avoiding encounters with fellow residents in the colony. To ensure minimal social interactions, he preferred going shopping around noon. By 8 pm, he would retire for the night, dozing off into a peaceful slumber. While his wife was alive both of them used to interact with my parents. However, following her passing, he started avoiding any interaction with them.

Whenever his son had the opportunity, he would visit him. According to what we learned from the son, his father chose not to move in with him. Additionally, he had completely severed ties with his wife's relatives as well. On two occasions, his son reached out to us on our landline when his father didn't respond to his calls. When my parents checked on him, he barely expressed gratitude and instead ended the conversation with a brief "hmm." However, I was truly impressed by him as he lived his life adhering to a routine, in his own unique way, and must have found happiness in his own world.

Recently, as I accompanied my dad to the hospital, I observed him sitting on his balcony, providing instructions to the painter working on the gate. The following day, I hurried back with my mother to gather more belongings for the hospital since my dad had been admitted. Once again, he was on the balcony, giving instructions to the painter. That was the last time I saw him.

Upon our return, we noticed his gate was locked, assuming that the son had possibly taken his dad, as it happened occasionally. However, today, a neighbor hurried to our home after reading about his death in the newspaper, seeking additional information. As anticipated, none of us had his contact details, but after a few inquiries, we managed to reach the son. According to the son, his dad had passed away two days ago. Feeling unwell, the son had requested his cousin to take him to Kochi, where the son lived. Unfortunately, his dad passed away on the way.It dawned on us that it was the very same day when my dad was discharged, and we had returned from the hospital.

It must be acknowledged that he opted for a solitary life and passed away in solitude, without causing any trouble for anyone, including his son. He serves as an illustration of the idea that we enter and leave this world in solitude, with others merely acting as spectators, adding drama to our lives.  confess a sense of sorrow, knowing the 4 am glow of his bedroom lights and the sight of him reading the newspaper until the milk vendor arrived will be missed forever.

Even in silence, he made his presence felt.

What's in a name?

What's in a name? Many of us must have come across this question in our lives. Last few months, most of us would have discovered that everything is in our name. If the names on our Aadhar and PAN do not match, they cannot be linked. Going back to the scenario, I discovered the pain when I was trying to open an account at SBI. Thanks to the lady at the counter, my PAN and Aadhar have the same name, and so does my passport. There are other IDs where I need to get my name rectified. Yet another battle I need to fight.

Last year, I visited a bank to move my investments from another bank as it was closing its operation in India. The branch head was a soft-spoken guy who understood my concerns and was ready to help me. He got all the papers signed and asked me to relax. "It's all taken care of," he said with a smile. As it was the last month of the financial year, he expected me to do some investments to meet his target. I had to politely decline his "investment" proposals as I was taken for a ride by the other bank. Within a week, I saw opt-out happening from the previous bank and the investments appearing under my new bank. I was elated. Little did I know that the bank mandate was still linked to the old bank, which is no longer operational in India.

As I am sitting trying to figure out how to sort out this current mess, I wonder why we have this issue in the first place. If an educated person is struggling, what about the uneducated ones? The answer is straightforward, someone somewhere is not doing his job honestly. If a person at work cannot copy the name from the proof submitted for ID generation properly, is he fit for the job? Why does a person selling insurance, mutual funds etc never insist on providing a nominee? In an era where we talk about climate change and planting more trees, why do some institutions still insist on paperwork?

That day is not far away when one cannot withdraw one's money from the bank as the name does not match the ID. As someone told me recently
"If you really think, it is a matter of just changing an entry in a simple database table." But for bureaucracy, "it's my way or the highway."